Thursday, 26 July 2012

Comment: Why women aren't attractive to men, and why women shouldn't care


This is a piece originally written for The National Student

Coming across the article 7 Things Men Find Unattractive About Women, it would be easy to breeze through it, scoff a little at the audacity and think nothing more of it.
Puppeteer

But if one were to stop a moment and really think about it there are plenty of things wrong with this article. Feminism is rarely about taking the easy option and it is time to start taking notice of silly articles such as this one in question which serve only to perpetuate myths about women and dictate to them how they should behave.
One would hope that most women are secure enough in themselves to decide they don’t really care what ‘men’ find attractive and are more focused on being happy.

One of the major issues with this piece is the generalisation of ‘men’ and ‘women’, suggesting that all women behave in the ways described and that all men object to it. It also suggests that the issues reside only within women and that men are getting off scot-free. Sorry, guys, not the case.

The first point brought up in the piece says that a woman who is too drunk is unattractive. Yes, she probably isn’t attractive when she is crawling across the floor to get to the toilet. But she probably doesn’t give a damn at that point whether the men stood at the bar think her hair looks pretty. She’s probably having a damn good time and has better things to worry about. It is not a woman’s sole duty to remain attractive to her man at all times so when she accidentally slips off the pedestal on which men have forced her to stand, probably in very uncomfortable shoes, don’t judge her for it.

According to this piece women are also not permitted bodily functions or excessive body hair. Or men are not meant to know about it anyway. By these standards women are expected to present themselves as hairless mannequins, not human beings. Women, just like men, are smelly, hairy animals. They are just expected to hide away the truth and parade around pretending they are naturally 90% hairless and never go to the bathroom other than to check that their hair is still perfect. It really is time that the secrecy surrounding what women do in the bathroom was broken down and men start accepting that women are not dolls and do the exact same thing as men in there. Try telling a man he must suddenly be discreet about his body functions and see how long he lasts before he feels like his guts might explode from the pain of holding it all in. Then he might start being a little more forgiving, whilst everyone else can enjoy watching his pain as punishment for being a bigoted bully.

Body hair is also still a massive issue. If someone happens to have dark hair on their upper lip or particularly hairy forearms then it is nobody’s business to tell them to remove it. Hairiness is not ‘manly’, it is part of being a human and it is time women were permitted the right to be a normal human too and not have to pretend otherwise. If men have an issue with female body hair then maybe it is time we women decided to take issue with men having body hair too and see how they react to this change. Either that or everyone start to accept that everyone else is hairy and realise that sexual attraction really should have nothing to do with constructed myths of hairless vulvas and knees.

An attractive woman is also not permitted to swear as this does not afford her much class. Well, unfortunately, this is no longer the eighteenth century and if a woman wishes to express herself with a spicy four letter word then she has every right to. True, swearing every other word isn’t a particularly attractive but this is not simply an issue of it being something that women do that men do not enjoy. It is something that almost everybody does and some others do not like it. Swearing is an issue for everyone, not just women, so men are going to have to clean up their act a little too.

One of the points in the article which I can possibly be inclined to agree with (slightly) is that when a woman wears too much makeup it can be a little unattractive. However, the only reason women are wearing so much makeup is because every magazine and advertisement, plastered on every television and street corner, is telling them that they need flawless skin and eyelashes longer than a camel’s. This bombardment of products only serves to lower self-esteem, resulting in more makeup being purchased, and make money for people who, quite frankly, couldn’t care if your forehead has a matte sheen. However, if someone decides that on Friday they would quite like to have violet eyelids and pink lips then it is their prerogative to do so and their choice of expressing themselves in this manner. It is not the sole purpose of makeup to make a woman more attractive to a man but to make herself feel a little better in the way she looks. She can paint her face however she pleases and should hopefully not care whether someone fancies a piece of her or not.

The piece also complains about women belittling and nagging their men. This sweeping generalization seems quite unfair and suggests that every woman will persistently tell her man off for doing something incorrectly or not doing things her way. Clearly it never occurred to men that women are simply asking them to do something, or suggesting a way of doing it differently. The term ‘nagging’ is just something men employ against women to try and make them feel guilty for their behaviour. It isn’t nagging. It’s asking, and if you ignore it then surely the only solution is to simply ask again. A particular favourite line of mine in the piece is men complaining about women nagging them for not shaving, yet a few lines earlier women were being berated for letting their legs get a little hairy. Oh, the beautiful irony.

The piece closes by begging for men to be left as nature intended and a promise to let women remain in a similar state. This seems somewhat out of place in an article which has dictated to women the way in which they must behave and appear in order for a man to want them. If only men would take their own advice and leave women behave as they please and appear as nature intended them to. An article of this nature has no place in modern society. A man has no right to tell a woman how to behave. If he doesn’t like a woman’s tendency to let her armpits get a little furry or her particular enjoyment of a pint or two then he needs to go and find himself a blow up doll to spend his time with as she is far less likely to ignore his objections. She also won’t ever go to the toilet.

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